i now know.

it is one thing.

to know you aught to esteem yourself low

to know you aught, and obey

out of obedience,

it is another thing

to know shame.

and know feeling worthless

not the sunday morning fire breath that says you should feel so

but to feel so

and feel quartered by horses

and fear.

it is amazing how life, moving strongly,

in a moment, will change who you are.

or maybe reveal who you are.

and what you must do to become who you want to be.

or how you must choose, reach into an unlit box and grab

when you don't know what to grab at but faith.