Monday, November 22, 2010

don't tell me what to do, tell me who to be

i have been living under the law.

the law is good and perfect
and the measure of
by which we discover the impossibility
of human godship, that nature we carry like oxen,

the original sin: belief that man is his own destiny,
the author and perfecter of his living,
and not the written page or the pen
or the tree that was cut and stripped to paper

and therefore, it is the roadmap to the truth: we are created.

but what is the gospel?
is it a human exchange: an impossible law for a possible one?
if so, we believe the lie the first was built to expose.
that we can. do. it. ourselves.

no. not a new law.

(like a simple shaking free from the impossible law of
crazy jews in the desert)
(like a choosing instead a new law that is easier
to obey, to earn your spot in a heaven that probably
doesn't exist as you think it does)

I do not want to trade impossibility for impossibility and call it 'life'.
I want to call it death as it was first called.

this is our current history, our zombie song:

"don’t teach me about politics and government
just tell me who to vote for
don’t teach me about truth and beauty
just label my music

don’t teach me how to live like a free man
just give me a new law

i don’t wanna know if the answers aren’t easy
so just bring it down from the mountain to me

i want a new law

don’t teach me about moderation and liberty
i prefer a shot of grape juice

don’t teach me about loving my enemies

don’t teach me how to listen to the Spirit
just give me a new law"

doesn't truth come in packages
delivered in puzzles
taught to you your whole life in pieces
so that when it finally rings true, it is assembled
from the familiar bones you've carried.

it is the gospel of grace,
the spirit written on your heart
that obeys the law

it has been said,
the man trying to be original never is,
the man telling the truth is almost always original
the man trying to make a good impression never does,
the man being himself and taking interest in another makes a good impression.

jed, stop pretending that you are living by the gospel
by shackling on a list of self-accomplishment by obedience,
by loving out of obedience
instead of loving out of who you are and who they are and who you are together

no one feels loved when they discover they are being loved by reason of looking lonely, sad, isolated, poor, or meek.
a man feels loved when who he is
is delighted in by another being who they are.

just remember your first love
and seek to know nothing but what Paul sought to seek to know nothing but

do not love the deeds of Christ
but Him
and His deeds will flow from right purpose through my fingers
and indeed I will not say it was me.

a mosaic suddenly makes a face.

i will certainly edit this in the coming days, as I find more clay fractures in the sand and place them rearrange them to fit.


match gurl said...

" no one feels loved when they discover they are being loved by reason of looking lonely, sad, isolated, poor, or meek. a man feels loved when who he is is delighted in by another being who they are. "

yes yes yes yes .

[or wOman, for that matter ;]

the above is why clear s i g h t is essential.
simple celebration becomes easy
once we slice through all the layered fronts/facades/affiliations---
and striking hot upon a pumping heart
whose beat is another new beautiful rhythm.

but if i spend too much,
do i then run the risk
of someday sitting alone saying,

"i see them.. . who sees me?"

a selfish, quiet thought.
a foolish, humble wish.
until i realize,
i need the vine.
i n e e d to abide.
there is no other
source of


so it is not me.
was never meant to be.
the pressure is lifted,
when i recognize the Spirit is stronger.
He can heal, and restore, those lost/lonely others


He sees me. [themUsWe]

and He wonders at the weird works of my boney fingers, the odd thoughts of my mishaped heart, the singular ideas of my twisted imagination.
He loves every ounce of Mary.
[as ?embarrassing as that is to say]
but i believe it's true...
that's how i know
He loves every ounce of Jed.
We bring Him laughter and heartache and hunger for more each day.

**this is just a splattering of a response. but your thoughts are so inspiring, i hate to send something back out into the void.

appreciate you!
happy thanksgiving back. <3

match gurl said...

freudian slip?

i meant "had" to send something back into the void.. . hm. conflicted. ;]